Megan the Water Moccasin and I were sitting on a sofa on the roof of the Music Box when this 18-year-old chatterbox sits down next to us and asks if we're there for "MSI." I actually had to think about that one for a minute.
"No, we're here for Kill Hannah," I answer.
Then he tells us that we're the first people he met who aren't there for Mindless Self Indulgence. I tell him it's because we're old. He thinks we're 24. This kid is too kind for words. I tell him I don't get MSI. He has to explain why people like them to me. Then he starts talking about rock and techno.
"So, they're like gravers?" I ask.
[Insert blank stare here.]
"Gravers, they're like a cross between goths and ravers."
"No, I'm not a goth."
Then I mention the baggy bondage pants that gravers wear and the neon bracelets and he says it's like candy kids.
"Yeah, definitely, but darker, like goths."
Then Megan asks me who is playing and I said it's Amanda from Perversion DJing (really good set, btw, she always looks like she's having fun in the booth and that really means something to everyone on the floor). Then the kid starts screaming "Oh my God, Amanda Jones."
"Yeah."
He's very excited. So excited that he grabs his friends and runs downstairs to dance, which leads me to believe that he probably goes to Perversion or one of her other gigs fairly often, meaning that he does have some sort of goth tendency. Now, back when my friends and I were goth, we would never admit to it either (remember to only mention industrial, was the mindset). However, at the same time, there was no greater insult than to be considered a candy kid. Well, there probably was and it probably involved patchouli, dreadlocks, Burning Man and sub-genres of tribal-trance or whatever. Regardless, why someone would rather identify with candy kids than goth is beyond me, but, whatever, he was a nice guy and he didn't look like as much of a Hot Topic clone as 98% of the crowd did. Dude from MSI made some crack about Hot Topic onstage. The irony was lost on most. Hell, the irony might have even been lost on the band. I thought maybe I was holding some sort of grudge against them for dressing the way my friends and I did when we went shopping on Melrose back in 1994. Turns out that I just don't get this band. Maybe you do. Maybe you can explain it to me. Chances are, it won't make much of a difference.
Kill Hannah, on the other hand, drives me nuts. I even stood at the front of the stage during the set, something that never happens on account of my hatred of crowds and odd crowd-enhanced odors. Megan, who had never seen the band before, was also impressed. (Can't wait until she posts her photos.) We got to chat with Mat briefly after the set and found out that the band will be touring "a lot" after the release of the new album next month. This made me happy because New Album (properly referenced as Until There's Nothing Left of Us) has been on repeated play in my car and at my desk and manages to grow more intense every time I hear it. Last weekend, I played it for Melissa as we drove out to Bang! and she flipped. So, not only do I want to hear the new songs live, but chances are strong that the band will have a whole new crowd of fans out here within a matter of a month.
Oh, and we're still trying to figure out who opened the show, since no one seemed to know. Megan thought "Juliesomething," which I think might mean "Julien-K," who are opening for the tour in San Francisco tonight.

There are two kinds of goths, those who dance to the beat and those who dance to the melody. My friend and I came to this conclusion years ago while dancing to this song inside one of those red-lit haunts of ours.

Virgin Prunes "Baby Turns Blue" (Extended Mix)
(song removed)

Melody Goths moved to this number, a club standard at the time, in drawn-out snake patterns matching the equally drawn-out lyric "Oh, what to do." These are the type of people who actually think "Bela Lugosi's Dead," in its un-remixed form, is perfectly suitable for a dancefloor. Beat Goths, who tended to have rivethead (um, that's industrial for the uninitiated) leanings, danced to this like one would dance to any other dance song, albeit with far more arm gestures. These are the folks who think, How the hell am I supposed to dance to "Bela Lugosi's Dead." My friend and I fell into the latter category. I don't know what his reasoning was, but, my thoughts were always that after spending my childhood with 8-counts drilled into my head as we learned new jazz dance routines to "Blue Monday," I was already programmed to move kick-snare-kick-snare. No amount of boo-spookiness could change that.

This song was actually one of the reasons that I started clubbing. Back in high school, one of my friends had scored a mixed tape of all the goth club hits and played it for me. "Baby Turns Blue" became my new favorite song. Despite everyone rambling about post-punk (i.e. everything that you heard at a goth club in 1995, when all of the hipsters were going apeshit over Sebadoh and busy making fun of the goth kids), Virgin Prunes are still overlooked. Perhaps it is because singer Gavin Friday unknowingly created a monster when he dubbed his childhood friend Paul Hewson "Bono." (Really, the campaign for canonization must be stopped, but don't hold that against Friday and the rest of the Prunes.) Perhaps it is because the band is still considered too strange, too "goth" for most hip tastebuds. I really have no idea.

This is the extended version of "Baby Turns Blue," which stems from the 12" single. The non-extended version is from the album If I Die, I Die, which you can find here.

Proof that DJ duo The Crystal Method have too much time on their hands:

Nike and THE CRYSTAL METHOD today announce the release of Drive: Nike + Original Run via the new Sport Music section of Apple iTunes Music Store. Drive is an original soundtrack composed by THE CRYSTAL METHOD to guide athletes through a 45-minute run, from warm-up through cool down.

Crystal Method’s Scott Kirkland said: "It's a challenge because usually when we create music, we're focused on what we like and what our fans will like. We're not accustomed to thinking about a particular activity that has to go with the music. For this project, we thought about the movement and the energy that goes into exercising and running and the sort of goal-oriented activity that goes along with working out. When I've worked out…it's always about goals: 'I'm doing the uphill now, I've got four minutes until I get to the goal.' So we created songs that have a lot of dynamic motion to them, songs that go places."

The Nike + iPod Spot Kit will connect the runners iPod with...their footwear (I'm not joking) to "connect you to the ultimate personal running and workout experience." What that really means is that your iPod will display all the pertinent information (calories burned, distance jogged, etc.) while bumping original tunes to your headphones.

Obviously, this is just the first in what will be a line of many collaborations between iTunes, Nike and music artists.

So I guess now would be a good time to place a copyright on the iPod dildo design...

No proper post from me today. Instead, you can read my article on Ellen Allien and Apparat from PopMatters.

Before we get started on last night's recap, I wanted to wish a speedy recovery to Anthony R., who is friends with pretty much everyone involved in this blog. Last Sunday, Anthony had driven to Long Beach so that he and our other very good friend Dave "NAFTA" could celebrate their birthdays at Disneyland. While en route, Anthony was severely rear-ended by a drunk driver. He was hit so hard that his car was pushed underneath the pickup in front of him, causing the roof of the car to cave. Fortunately, Anthony escaped without serious injury, proving that the fates are definitely on his side. Anthony, hope you feel better soon and enjoy the Flexeril while it lasts!

Now on to last night's recap.

'Til Tuesdays was packed once again. From the DJ booth, the floor liked this:



Outside was just as packed, although you can't really tell from these photos.



That's Robert and his friends.



The infamous Balthazar Monsoon is the one covering up the logo on his homemade Saint Etienne t-shirt. The other guy is Trevor from Winston and the Telescreen, who happens to be playing 'Til Tuesdays next week.

The best thing about last night: Bros and Goths dancing side-by-side to a Cure/Snoop Dogg mashup. PLUR, man. Here's the setlist.

Basement Jaxx v. Blancmange-- Where's Your Ceiling?
The Rapture-- House of Jealous Lovers
White Stripes-- Blue Orchid (Dirty Funker Mix)
Miss Kittin and the Hacker-- Frank Sinatra
Mylo v. Scissor Sisters-- Drop the Numb
Daft Punk-- Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger (Pete Heller Mix)
Royksopp-- What Else is There? (Thin White Duke Mix)
Snoop Dogg v. The Cure --Drop it Like it's Close to Me
M.I.A.-- Bucky Done Gun
Lady Sovereign-- Random
Gorillaz-- Dare (DFA Mix)
Depeche Mode v. New Order-- Strange Love Triangle
Bastard Pop-- Kylietron
Murry Head-- One Night in Bangkok (Hot Hands Mix)
(Note: I got this from The Rich Girls Are Weeping last month, don't know if it's still online)
Peaches-- Set it Off (GMF Mix by Tobi Neuman)
Dahlia-- Burning Up
Wolfmother-- Woman (Mstrkrft Mix)
She Wants Revenge-- Tear You Apart
Stereo Total-- Wir Tanzen im 4eck (Bis Mix)
Stevie Nicks-- Stand Back

Thanks to everyone for making this happen.

Before I sign off to get back the work I should be doing, please note that Dahlia is playing tonight at Carbon in West L.A. for What the DJ Wants. I probably won't be able to make it, being on deadline and all, but you should go.

This is the week of my first deadline as an editor. Most likely, I will not sleep for the next few days. I might not be able to post much either. I will, however, be behind the decks at 'Til Tuesdays tonight. You should go.

Dahlia was first on the bill last night, which sometimes means death because people rarely arrive at shows in time to see the first of three artists. However, Ms. Dahlia was on fire. I'm not just saying this as a fan or a friend. The guys behind me kept asking each other "Who is this? She's awesome!" Outside, after her performance, I heard a group discussing how "awesome" the set was and "do you think she has CDs for sale?" When Dahlia eventually relocates to Los Angeles, she is going to build up quite a fan base. Here are some pictures taken with my brand new phone that I haven't quite mastered at this point. I took video too, but my video option only allows recording 15 seconds at a time.









Punk Bunny followed with one of the strangest shows I have seen in some time. There were times when I thought I might have to step outside because it was like one of those surreal moments when I'm half-asleep at 4 a.m. and the infomercial for the real estate scheme run by twin midgets comes on only to be followed by the one for the device that removes "fecal matter" from your system and I can't really figure out if I took too many sinus pills and am dreaming this or if it is real.

By the time we left, roughly midnight, The Hacker had not arrived. I don't know if he ever made it. Frankie was behind the decks and he did an excellent job. I particularly enjoyed the remix of Depeche Mode's "John the Revelator" that he played.

(I just found out from Dave that The Hacker did arrive after we left. Ah, the hell of airports.)

I ended up talking to one of my friends last night about the incredibly small amount of European techno/electro DJs that make it out to L.A. It's a conversation that comes up time and again, so I thought I would share what I learned from doing Transmission for two years.

L.A. is not a dance town in the same sense that Berlin or Montreal or Detroit are dance towns. When L.A. does dance, it's mostly to progressive house and/or trance. That said, DJs like Oakenfold, Sasha, Digweed, Tiesto, et. al. have no problem bringing in the crowds. Certainly electro and/or techno events happen in Los Angeles, but even the most successful are small in comparison to Friday nights at Avalon. Now, when I did Transmission, booking agents did approach me about some big-time European DJs. Even though I loved these artists and continually played their productions and remixes, I had to say no simply because there was no way we could budget for such things. Transmission was a little different because it was intended to be a free club and The Parlour was a fairly small venue (at the very most, capacity was 300 and that's probably a stretch). However, my best guess is that even clubs that do charge a cover would have a problem bringing out such DJs. Because the European DJs generally don't do full-scale tours, the promoter would have to fly out the artist, get the hotel room, feed the artist and then pay the performance rate. This can be extremely expensive, particularly in consideration of the fact that L.A. clubs generally don't charge more than $20 at the door and, usually, cover is somewhere in the neighborhood of $10. Then you have to think about how many people you can get through the door. If it's a club with an already established, large crowd, you can probably estimate that you would get roughly the same amount of people as you would any other night. If it's a monthly or a one-off, the crowd is almost solely reliant on the DJs' draw, which is a gamble considering that even if the person has a song or remix that is incredibly popular on the L.A. dancefloor, most of the crowd won't know the artist by name, unless it's Miss Kittin or Felix da Housecat. (Aside: That's why I always post playlists.) Plus, L.A.-based press tends to completely ignore dance music unless it's either so hipster that everyone else is already talking about it, involves DJ AM or, you guessed it, is progressive house, which really limits your capabilities to hype the event. (Also, I firmly believe that My Space is completely useless in club promotion, but that's a different rant all together.) That said, I think most of us are going to have to head out on European road trips if we want to see Tiefschwarz spin anytime soon.

This is Hollywood Boulevard in sepia.


And this is Hollywood Boulevard after Melissa and I passed the crunch and sped towards Orange.


"Why?" we asked. Why must people flood this half-assed Times Square nightly? Why are we driving through this mess instead of taking Franklin?

We answered the second question. Someone wouldn't let us into the right turn lane. The first question, though, remains a mystery. Is mall culture so pervasive that people don't even think twice about flying across the country to visit one? Someone should really tell them that there is a Virgin Megastore and a Gap in Burbank and you won't spend your gas money on parking to go there.

Then you have to wonder if people come down to Hollywood Boulevard and think that this is really Los Angeles. That seeing this:



Right next to this:



Is reality.

Hollywood apparently does a swell job of pimping itself as the playland of the stars. Can you imagine what a god like David Bowie might actually have to say to Paula Abdul?

We have other reasons for cruising down to the corner of Hollywood and Sycamore. Simply put, this end of Hollywood Boulevard is probably the least hipster place in the city (excluding The Valley). What non-locals might not know is that there is an invisible wall at Cahuenga Boulevard that actually electrocutes hipsters who try to defect to the west end of Hollywood. That is why hipsters never travel past The Beauty Bar, even if some member of Can is playing at The Knitting Factory. (The Wall was temporarily deactivated last summer when Arcade Fire played at The Bowl.) Hipsters are, therfore, more likely to stay inside their Silverlake/Echo Park apartments ("That's not a studio, that's a bedsit!") on a Saturday night listening to Devendra Banhart, Lavender Diamond or some other neo-folk thing that, for some reason or other, makes non-hipsters likes us sing the one line that we remember from "Edge of Seventeen" ("Just like the white-winged dove, blahblahblah, blahblah, blahblahblah, ooh ooh ohh.") than they are likely to cross The Wall. BTW, there probably is no connection between neo-folk and Stevie Nicks other than a bunch of people who looked like they just rolled out of a Topanga Canyon hippie commune (even though Topanga Canyon is a good 45 minute drive from the hipster enclave of Silverlake/Echo Park).

I think that might have been a digression. The point of this whole rant is that, given that Melissa and I are totally anti-hipster at this point (not because we are trying to cover up hipsterness but, rather, because if you saw us you would probably think "Oh my God, there's no way those two could ever fit in at Star Shoes." We try not to look towards the Olsen twins for fashion advice.), we find solace at Bang! Here, we can enjoy Pet Shop Boys classics then run over to the pop room so that Mellie can do her interpretive dance to Madonna's "Express Yourself." Then, we can spend most of our time in the main room contemplating the awesomeness of Alison Goldfrapp's wardrobe or exclaiming such proclamations as "Is it a Zeppelin? Is it a Sabbath? No, it's Wolfmother!" Good times. No hipsters.